Saturday, April 25, 2009


so, my cousin, carley, and i had a bet.

i'm not going to say what the bet was, but if she lost, she had to make some online accounts.

because carley is not what you would call wired in. far from it.

so. she lost. :)

and her blog url is, same for twitter and myspace (username: palsessi, that is). 

love you all!

long, juicy post coming soon. i promise!


Saturday, April 11, 2009

color quiz results.

i found a link to this quiz on someone's blog, so, of course i had to take it. 
it seems somewhat accurate (albeit being described on the site as "very accurate" ... exaggerated advertising strikes again!)... i don't know. TRUE OR NOT?
(i posted the results below so there would be no need for links or anything.)

Free personality analysis of roxy
Generated on Sat, 11 Apr 2009 12:00:05 -0700

roxy's Existing Situation

"Is sensitive and easily influenced by other's thoughts and emotions. Looking for friendly, easy-going relationships and jobs that help develop them."

roxy's Stress Sources

"Needs to meet people who have the same high principals and values as himself, but finds the need unfulfilled. her need to feel dominate and superior leaves her feeling isolated and does not allow for her to give freely of himself. she would like to surrender and let go, but sees that as a weakness she must not give in to. Holding back will allow her to stand out for the crowd and earn a higher status, recognized by others as unique and important."

roxy's Restrained Characteristics

Current events leave her feeling forced into compromise in order to avoid being cut off from affection or future cooperation.

Has strong emotional demands and is picky when it comes to choosing a partner. she chooses to remain emotionally distant and uninvolved in relationships.

"Although she is able to find contentment through sexual activity, she feels hopeless to change her problems and difficulties and continues to make the best of what she has."

"Struggles to make her demands clear, but feels ignored. Feels resentful, but acts as if she doesn't care, doing what is necessary to keep peace."

Current events leave her feeling forced into compromise in order to avoid being cut off from affection or future cooperation.

roxy's Desired Objective

Seeks to be known for something she has accomplished and uses her social abilities to win people over. Emotional and sensitive and romantic.

roxy's Actual Problem

"Impressed by unique and one of a kind things, and by people with exceptional personalities. Tries to takes the characteristics she likes in other people and apply it to herself as well as coming across as a unique individual."

Friday, April 10, 2009

post #50! dance with me, baby!

Take this survey

What's your favorite color gummy bear?
What is the sexiest part of the opposite sex's body?
um. face. (cliched, i know, but he's got to have an amazing smile)
Have you ever made up/sang a song for someone you cared about?
pahaha. i can't write poetry/songs. but my friends and i have sang to each other as jokes.
Ever had a song sang about/for you?
-thinks- actually, yes. (landon; that "far away" song by nickelback)
Is there a baby in the room with you right now?
pahaha. there isn't even a baby DOLL in this whole house.
Do you know how to dance?
i like to think so. :P
Where do you sing the most, in the car, the shower or other?
i sing. shower. onstage. um. in my room. to my kitkat.
What is your favorite thing that is green?
my limegreen sharpie! lol. um. i have a ring with a green stone in it that i wear a lot.
What did your last text message say?
"that's the shittiest excuse i've ever heard"
Boxers, briefs or boxer briefs?
uhhh. i don't know.
What is your middle name?
it starts with a J and it's five letters long.
What is the way to your heart?
be my friend.
What do you smell like?
well, i guess my shampoo, which has a fruity smell, since i just got out of the shower.
What's in your pocket?
pajama pants are pocketless.
Anything in your mouth?
tongue. teeth. gums.
Ever hurt yourself playing Wii?
pahaha. no.
Do you have freckles?
i have five exactly. two are on my legs, two are on my stomach and one on my arm.
How many languages can you say "Hello" in?
um. hello. hola. howdy. ciao. bonjour. five.
What's the last movie you saw in the theater?
honestly? right now i don't remember.
Ever jumped/fallen/been pushed in a pool with your clothes on?
ohhh yes. good times. :)
Are you wearing any clothes that you wore yesterday?
negative. it's kind of gross to put on what you were wearing BEFORE you took a shower.
Name a song that you know all the words to:
most/all anberlin, fm static, flyleaf, fall out boy, avril lavigne, and green day songs
Are you in love with someone right now?
pahaha. um. no.
What's the last thing you watched on TV?
an at&t commercial
What's the last video game you played?
guitar hero
Who is your daddy and what does he do?
my daddy is my father. he's partially responsible for me being here. he works a job most of the time
Can you do the alphabet in sign language?
i can.
Do you have an unkle named Joe?
"unkle," you say? i don't have such a thing. as for unCles, no, i don't.
What word do you use when people pass gas?
"awwwww shiiiiiiiiiiit" ... pahaha
Do you wear glasses?
What can you hear right now?
commercial on the radio
Did you feel better or worse or the same yesterday?
right now i'm a freakin' zombie.
Ever been overseas?
sort of.
What are your plans for today?
saturday... sleep in, baby.
How long have you had MySpace?
a while.
What was your favorite childhood show?
bill nye the science guy
Are you close to your siblings?
i'm closer to my brother than i am to my sister
What was your first job?
first job? president of the roxy lemonade company.
Do you bite your nails?
when they break
Do you like your feet?
super gay, fetishy freakish question. i don't know. i suppose. feet are feet are feet.
Do you sleep well at night?
more or less.

Monday, April 6, 2009

normally, i'd write this post later on, but there's nothing else to do, so why not?

got back from the hill about five minutes ago. 

jake roxy is extremely protective of his little kitty tail. he'll be all happy and purring and such, just sitting there, but if you touch his tail (i mean touch with your finger, not pull or anything), he'll hiss at you.


and then he might shake his paw at me, depending on his mood. 

anyways. my "date" with landon. it wasn't really a date; it was simply two friends going out to chat and catch up on old times and .... nobody wants to hear that bullshit. okay. well, actually we wound up making out for a while and then we did it in the backseat of his car and now i think i might be pregnant and ... oh, wait, none of that is true.


well, i got there first, but he wasn't there, so i went in the bathroom and made sure my hair looked okay. (which it did. saturday was an awesome hair day.) when i came out, he was there, looking at a coffee display. 

he looks pretty much the same as he used to, except he might be a little bit taller. he's definitely more muscular, and i don't know what happened to his eyes, but... wow. i definitely don't remember them being that blue. or, well, piercing. 

i remember he's always had a gorgeous smile. i mean, he still does have that, but his eyes are freakin' hypnotic now. 

i'll just be succinct and say he got hotter, somehow.

but that sounds too crass. 


"roxy?" he says, like he's not sure who i am.

"hi," i say.

he smiles. "you look great."

"you do too."

LIE LIE LIE. he looks amazing. 

so, then we walk up to the counter, and order our drinks and take them over to this little table in the corner by a big window. 

he said he wasn't sure i'd show.

i asked him why. i mean, seriously. i was the one who called HIM. why wouldn't i show?

or is that code for "i was kind of hoping you wouldn't show so i could get my decaf mango/papaya/banana/vanilla/caramel/cinnamon mocha with skim milk, hold the whipped cream, with a cherry on top and go home in peace"? 

(i don't know if such an atrocious drink really exists. but i swear, it took the guy in front of us a full minute to describe what he wanted. at least.)

he said he didn't know. then he's like, "blah blah, it's been a while, why did you call, blah blah"

(okay, so he wasn't THAT blase about it. or even rude.)

i said he'd just popped into my head (i conveniently left out the part about wc's tag, and my blog... god only knows, he might try to read it or something. not that i care.)

i asked him why we'd broken up... i honestly can't remember, really. he said he doesn't remember either. he also asked me if i'd been dating anyone. i said no. which is true, really,  but he doesn't have to know about all of my little crushes and such. he had one girlfriend, named either alexandra or alexandria. not sure which. i think i might actually know his girlfriend... unless i'm thinking of the wrong alexandr[i]a, because i sure as hell haven't seen landon ANYWHERE since we broke up. 

but he and this alex girl are broken up now.

perfect timing.

not that i'm looking to get back together with him. at least i don't think so. not yet. 

so we talked for a while about random shit and all... then we left. i went home, and alan texted me and suggested we go out to the hill. so we did. we ate big macs (more like big macstake) and talked about nothing. i told him about landon (turns out, he knows landon and thinks he's a good person) and he said to just let whatever happens happen. 

we figured out that we'd met sometime a while ago, when landon and i were dating. just in passing... 

HA. and to think we'd wind up friends all this time later by chance. 

sunday = boring. 

today = equally boring. yay for spring break. the other family are coming here soon and i really, really, really don't want that to happen. ugh. 

because it's not like i can go run off to hang out with my friends. (i don't know what jake's doing, but i know c&c are going off to do something with the church... evangelizing the lost or something. who knows. thankfully, my dad thought it was ridiculous (i'm not sure why he's even going to this church... he and i are basically of the same opinion as far as church goes, more or less) and my mother thought it was unnecessary, and rude, since the dear lord only knows what the family would think of us if i went away while family are here. fuck it. alan's staying here, i know, which is good for me.) my mother would make me take joolz with me. carley and ryan i don't really mind, because they're good people, but joolz... well, i guess she can always babysit mandy. watch me not give a fuck.

shit, this is long... well, i'm going to go... find a snack or something. i wonder if carley still has the pink in her hair. maybe this time we can go get snakebites. pahaha.


Thursday, April 2, 2009

just fine and dandy

so... um. well, i found landon's number.

and i held onto it for a few days, debating on whether or not to call him.

then i threw his number away. i said, "fuck it, he's part of my past, let it go, roxy."

but then i fished his number out of the trashcan and dialed it before i could change my mind. 

and then i realized that i still knew his number by heart, because i didn't even look at the paper as i was punching the buttons on my phone.

i was really worried that he didn't have the same number, because i remember that he changed his number, like, three times when we were dating. (i'm not sure why. i think he switched services and they gave him different numbers.)


"hi," he said.

"hi," i said. 


"this is roxy," i said.

"i know," he said.

i was surprised, because i hadn't even been smart enough to say, "hi, this is roxy," when he picked up. 

"you do?" i said.

"yeah," he said.

"how?" i said.

"i recognized your voice."

OF COURSE HE DID. i've never been good at recognizing people's voices on the phone. i always have to ask who's calling, if caller id doesn't show it.

"um," i say, because i'm just that articulate.

he laughs. "what's up? it's been a while."


looking back, i'm thinking this must be the worst case of nerves EVER. if there's one thing i can do, it's talk (ask anyone who knows me), and i've never been a shy kid or stricken dumb with stage fright. yet there i was, acting like my tongue was glued to the roof of my mouth with peanut butter. (why does peanut butter do that, anyway?)

"how have you been?" he says.

"pretty good," i say. "you?"

"not bad."

and we're silent again. i used to spend HOURS talking to this guy... online, in person, on the phone... and now we have nothing to say to each other?

"you know, it's weird that you call," he says. "i was just thinking about you."

"really?" i say.

i have a feeling that he's lying to make me feel better or something.

"all good things, i hope," i continue.

he laughs. "you know i always think good things about you, z."

and then i felt better.

landon has always had a million nicknames for me: rox (which, surprisingly, very few people ever call me), x (for the x in my name), z (because the "xy" tends to be pronounced like a z), ro (either short for rock on or like row, row, row your boat), RJ (my first and middle initals), JC (my middle and last initials), RC (first and last), etc. 

well, long story short, we talked for a while and one thing led to another and we're going out on saturday. to starbucks, around noon or something. 

i'm kind of chipper right now. :)